Daily Ponderings

I had this picture on my computer for something I did a few years ago. I am assuming this was taken when I was maybe 8 or 9. I'm in the middle with my sisters surrounding me. Aren't we cute?? Written by melonlady1724 . Link to this entry This entry has 2 comments: ( Add your own ) Way too cute - and great costumes! Comment from fitzzer - 11/5/05 2:01 PM awwww! Such cuties. :) Thanks for sharing, my friend. Comment from anglswinks - 10/31/05 12:40 PM

Halloween has always been one of my favorite holidays! When I was little, I just wanted all the candy and the party at school. When I got a little older, the candy was still nice to have, but then I wanted to have an awesome costume! That worked out for the most part. Sadly, though, in order to go trick-or-treating, I had to wear long underwear or a coat over my costume because it usually was so cold to go without. What a bummer, no one could see what I was! lol Nowadays, I love to see the kids coming around with their costumes, especially the little ones! They are soooo cute!! Speaking of little ones, my niece is going to be a yellow flower! I can't wait to see her! Mandy is going to take her around in a little while. And today, the weather is pretty nice for once. That probably means I'll get a lot of trick-or-treaters, and I'll run out of candy quick! lol Enjoy the day, all! Written by melonlady1724 . Link to this entry This entry has 1 comments: ( Add you...

It's been several months since I had to get a phone number for my house so I could use the internet. Ever since I've had the number I was given, I've gotten a ton of calls for the woman who must have had it before me. All I'd like to know is where in the world is Darlene Destino???????? You would think someone would give you their new number when they get it. Darlene either forgot to do so, or she has vanished from the planet. I get calls from telemarketers, and I have to tell them that she no longer uses the number. At least they don't try to sell me anything. Then I'd have to tell them that the number is on the Do Not Call Registry . At least I was smart to do that! I get reminder calls from the Catholic Charities WIC program. After the fourth call from them the other night, I finally called today to let them know that I got Darlene's number. The woman was very apologetic about it, but it's not her fault! It's Darlene's! Now tell me s...

So far today, I've gotten a lot accomplished. Mind you, my arms are still sore, but I'm trying to just shrug it off. And I guess it's working! I've washed the dishes. I've cleaned the entire bathroom. I've also done a big load of laundry AND hung all the clothes up to dry. I can't tell you the last time I hung up my undies because I didn't do it for years since my sister and her hubby were living upstairs. lol But that's all done! I even walked for 10 minutes. Perhaps that is why I had such an energy boost today. I was planning on just going back under the covers this morning, since it's so yucky, gloomy and rainy for the 4th day in a row. However, I've got a lot done! I think that's it for a while. I don't want to overdo it! I got an email from someone I love dearly this morning. And it has disappointed me so much. I can't go into details here, but I have to say that I never thought she'd risk losing something...

My arms still hurt, but after 2 Tylenol arthritis, it is starting to subside. I'm hoping they will be much better tomorrow! I told my doctor about my support group meeting today, and she told me she is so very proud of me. She said the support group gives me new purpose. She's so right. For the longest time, I've felt like, why am I here? I can't work, what am I supposed to be doing with my life? The support group is a new beginning for me, and it is so needed. The group is needed to bring people together. I need the group to know that I'm not so alone with PH, but to also give me the feeling that I'm accomplishing something. And so far, it's working. :) I think I need to go to bed. It's so early, though, I'll end up waking at like 7am. I'm trying to hold off until at least midnight. I think the shots have made me sleepy! I sure hope they hold back the flu and pneumonia for the pain they've caused me today. lol Oh well, g'ni...

I hurt. This entry will not be long because my upper forearms are killing me. I went to my doctor today for a checkup. Lo and behold, I needed both a flu shot AND a pneumonia vaccine. Lucky me!! Her nurse put one shot in each arm. I can barely move my right arm without complaining. So, this entry must end at this moment. Bring on the pain meds!!!

I had a very busy weekend, and although it was a lot of fun, I'm paying for it today. Friday was girls' night, and it was the best time! I had so much fun, and we laughed so hard that it bothered me the next day. Imagine that, even laughing can cause problems for me! But that sure doesn't mean I'm not going to laugh! Last night was my friend's wedding. And it was fun, too! The food was good, the music sucked (the DJ was awful, I must make a mental note never to hire him for anything!), but we did dance! However, that threw me for a loop, too. I was quite tired by the end of the night. And today, I woke up very exhausted. I even have a little chest pain, which I know is because I've overdone it. However, I see my doctor tomorrow, and if I still have it, I will tell her about it. I'd like to thank those who left such kind words in my last entry. My essay for the contest was a hard one to write, but the comments left make me realize that I do have m...

Our dearest Judi has asked us to write about what we would like someone to know about us. This is for the October Artsy Essay contest . I kept going back and forth on what I'd like people to know about me, and I finally have decided. I was born with congenital heart disease (I have 2 holes in my heart), and a rare lung condition called pulmonary hypertension. Since doctors had no good answers for my parents on how to treat my condition when I was a baby, they were told that I might survive a year, or I might survive 50. They had no idea, but told my parents to prepare for the worst. After reaching my 30th birthday last month, it is quite apparent to me that somehow I'm beating the odds. I grew up with a lot of limitations, and I still have many that I face as an adult. And while so many people have told me how strong I am, how unbelievable I am to brave everything I go to, my biggest secret is that I long terribly to have a normal life. I wish so much that I was a normal...

AWESOME!!! I had to admit I was so nervous yesterday morning trying to get ready to go to the hospital for my meeting. I was worried about getting there, I was worried about where to park, how to find the room, what the heck to say, etc, etc. But everything went smoothly! I didn't get lost going there (thanks to Mapquest, surprising, huh, Mort?? hehe). The lot where I parked was right across the doors from where the auditorium was located. What luck that was, since we had quit a bit of things to carry! And by the time the meeting started, I just told me story, and things flowed from there! Everyone told their story, and asked so many questions, that I didn't even have to direct the conversation! The 2 hours were gone so fast, I bet we could have been there for a longer time. I can't wait until I start planning for the next meeting, which might be late January or in February. I'm going to look for a guest speaker, as soon as I figure out a topic! By the way, t...

I received a call just about 20 minutes ago from a father who is bringing his daughter to the support group meeting tomorrow. He was trying to get the address of the hospital so he could look it up on Mapquest . He told me that this support group has come at the right time for his daughter, because she feels like giving up. She is 23. Her father told me he is so grateful that I'm having this, and that he looks forward to tomorrow. I immediately had tears in my eyes. I believe all of us PHers have felt that same way at some point, like giving up. I'd be lying if I said I haven't had that thought now and then. I am so glad I'm doing this. I feel so overwhelmed already with care for the people I'm about to meet tomorrow. I am glad God pointed me in the right direction when I was making a decision about whether to start this or not. This will be a good thing, a very good thing. Written by melonlady1724 . Link to this entry This entry has 2 comments: ( Add your o...

Wednesday was the last day to RSVP for my support group meeting on Saturday. I got 2 calls today, which was fine! So right now I have a total of 10 people listed as coming. This would include 7 PH patients, and 3 family members. This is not including my mom and I. A representative from Accredo is also coming. I have yet to hear from my PH specialist. I've emailed him twice, but no response. That's ok, though. I honestly never expected him to even suggest coming, and it's understandable if he doesn't want to drive the 3 hours to get here! So maybe next time! I'm so looking forward to this meeting. A part of me is very nervous. I'm not a person who likes to get up in front of a crowd and just talk away. So this is a different venue for me, but I think it will be good. I wanted to meet other people going through what I've experienced. And this is what is happening! It's exciting and nerve-wracking, all rolled into one. I'll be surprised if I...

I went to Cleveland Tuesday/Wednesday for a checkup with my PH specialist at the Cleveland Clinic. I mentioned before that I had been worried about going, and that I usually get that way before I go (see THIS if you want to catch up). I'm always worried about going to the doctors! Anyhow, I freaked out for nothing. Yet again! I actually had a pretty good walk, despite feeling like crap that morning. And it wasn't because of my cold. That has pretty much disappeared. But for some reason, I felt a little carsick on the way to the Clinic that morning. And then, the elevator to the 9th floor where the Pulmonolgy department is made me want to hurl. It always does. It's THE worst elevator I've ever been on!! Anyway, back to the walk. I didn't walk as far as the last time (1200 ft v. 1300 ft from May), but I felt a lot better than before. And my oxygen levels were better, too! Instead of dropping to 49% like last time, they dropped to 59%! That's an impro...

I just had an interesting conversation with Pat, the brother of Tom, who I surely thought I was in love with for years. And I told Tom how I felt last summer, and he basically shut me down. I've gotten over that, for the most part. I can't lie and say there aren't days when I don't miss him, because I do. It's just not as hard as it was before. Anyhow, while chatting with Pat, he brings up his brother, and he's saying some not-so-nice things about him. He starts telling me Tom's dating some chick who is a witch (substitute a certain letter), and another name which I shall not mention. Well, several names he called her, but they not publishable, so you get the drift. I wasn't too surprised by this, as he's said this about a couple other girls Tom's been with. However, I was very taken aback when Pat told me that this chick treats Tom like crap and IS STILL MARRIED!!! I can't believe Tom would stoop so low as to go out with a married wo...

It's a beautiful day today, and it feels more like summer than fall! It makes me feel like I should put off things like putting down the storm windows, getting out my fall/winter attire, and decorating for Halloween. Of course, this warm weather is only supposed to last until Thursday, when it'll go back to the normal weather for this time of year. Darn it all! I guess I'll enjoy it while it lasts! My fat cat turns 5 years old today! It's hard to believe I've had Mittens for almost that long, too. (I got him as a Christmas gift in 2000). I don't know what I'd do without him. It's funny how sometimes your pet can feel like your kid or just another member of your family. Mittens has been wonderful to have, and he cheers me up when I'm feeling down. Yes, there are times when I get a little ticked off at the things he does, but what animal, or human for that matter, is perfect?? So Happy Birthday, my little man! (one of the many nicknames I ha...

My sore throat that I caught from grandma last weekend went from bad to worse by Thursday. It was awful! I felt so yucky, and then the cough started. I HATE coughing! Because I have PH, I can't take any type of decongestant. It causes more problems with the lungs. I can take a cough suppressant, but I might as well drink the bottle, because it doesn't always help much. Wednesday night, I got about 4 hours sleep all night since I was coughing so badly. The coughing started making my ear ache so badly, I just wanted to rip my entire head off!! On Thursday I finally called the doctor and got an antibiotic. Yay, drugs!! I had another round of coughing fits on Thursday night, but I did manage to get a little more sleep than the night before. Last night, I didn't cough at all! Yay!! So I'm slowly on the mend. Which is good, because I just hate being sick!! I hope this means I won't get sick for the rest of the winter!! This coming Wednesday, I have another...

It's hard to believe that a week ago, I was in Horseheads! I don't know where the week went, but it flew. Anyhow, here's one of the things I did while I was there! My grandma had bought tickets to see the play, 42nd Street . It had been a while since I've even been to a play, and I hadn't seen that one. I had heard about it, but wasn't exactly sure what the storyline was about. So I was excited to go because my grandma doesn't always have an opportunity to bring her grandkids to something like this (she has over 25 grandkids, and several great-grandkids!), and I was going to see a play I hadn't seen before! Saturday morning rolls around, and grandma announces she's got a sore throat that is not going away. So she is not sure about going to the play. However, she does decide to go to an outdoor festival thing going on in downtown Elmira (coincidentally across the street from where we'd be seeing the play). When we got back home, she definit...

I realized I haven't written since my birthday, and then I also realized that I went away last Friday, and came back yesterday. lol I know I was busy the week before my trip, too, so that's another reason I haven't written in a while. Anyway, I went to my grandma's house in a little town called Horseheads, NY. It's right near Elmira, and it's a quiet area for the most part. It's about a 3 hour drive from my house, and usually very beautiful the closer we get there. The trip was very nice. I saw family that I haven't seen in quite some time, and it was so great seeing them! The one thing I took home from the trip: my grandma's sore throat. Grrr! So now I'm sick, and slowly (ever so slowly) am I getting better. It's so annoying not to be able to take a decongestant, or else I'd have this dumb cold gone by now! Ugh!! Anyhow, I plan on writing more about my trip, but right now, I need to get some sleep. Hopefully I'll be able ...

Today is my 30th birthday! Some of you may think, "OMG, she's gone mad!! Celebrating being 30?? Oh my!" Well, I think of it as quite the opposite! I think of it as 30 years that I might not have had, considering my health conditions, and that my parents were told I might not live past the age of one. So, I thank the Good Lord for another year, and I pray that I might have 30 more!! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!! I'm having a party at my parents' house tonight with a bunch of family and friends. I'm looking forward to it, because they all mean so much to me. More than I can explain in words. I think they are a reason I'm still here after 30 years, because they show me such love and support when I'm going through tough times. I love them all, and I thank them also for giving me such happiness! Ok, before I get too mushy, I'm off to rest a bit before getting changed and going to my parents'. I hope you all have a great day! :) Written by melonlady...

Being part of a support group is wonderful. You slowly start to feel like the other members are family, for the most part. They are people who really can sympathize with you, because they know exactly how you feel and your emotions since they also deal with the same thing. For over 2 years now, almost 3, I have belonged to PHA , and I read the message boards at least twice, sometimes 3 times a day. I've also participated in weekend chats, and chats on Wednesday nights. I've gotten to know many people, and I care about them all. We all support each other when we're down, or even when we have good news. We welcome the newcomers with open arms. It's wonderful to feel like part of a group who truly cares about each other. And I'm not even sure if I"ll meet any of these people because we are all over the country, all over the world. With this all being said, we have lost a member of our "family." A wonderful woman who had PH so long, has died from it. ...

I am rather irritated. Because of my health, I haven't worked in about 5 years. Since I haven't worked in that long, I usually have no reason to get up very early in the morning anymore. Once in a blue moon, but not all that often. Today I awoke to the lovely sound of 2 shitzu's scream barking at the top of their little shitzu lungs. Mind you, their wonderful pal, the golden lab, decided to also join in the ruckus. It was still dark outside when this occurred!! It could have been the middle of the night for all I knew, but according to my watch after I activated Indiglo, it was 6am!!! 6am people!! I do NOT get up at this hour!! After contemplating two very tempting options (one being yelling a obscenities out the window, the other one involving hurling a heavy object out the window), I decided on the third option of turning over and trying to go back to sleep. Somehow, I managed to drift back off into Lala Land. Only to be awoken about an hour later by a very loud sou...