Feeling Down

The past several days, I haven't felt like myself. While I do laugh and joke with my family and friends, either in person or on the phone, a couple things have been bothering me lately. My father is one of them, because of his non-chalant attitude about his prostate cancer that I can't understand. I'm trying to just "let go" of my worries about it, since there isn't much that I can do but pray that he actually does do something about it after July (he won't do anything until after my sister's wedding, July 29th). I think the stress of the whole situation is really getting to me, and I just can't let that happen. My health will start to deteriorate if I constantly worry about him right now.

Another sort of sadness started on Sunday night. I was supposed to be going to a good friend's wedding this coming Saturday. My friends, my sisters, and I have been looking forward to it for months. Not to mention my friend, who just last Thursday was telling perfect strangers about her plans. Sunday night, I was told that the wedding wasn't going to happen. At first I thought it was just a joke (now who would joke about that??), but slowly it started to sink in that it was very real. My friend's fiance...well, I guess ex-fiance now....told her he couldn't go through with it. My heart aches for her. I know that she is devastated, although I have yet to talk to her. I don't think she wants to talk to anyone just yet. I can't blame her. She truly thought this was the person for her, and she couldn't wait to be married and start a family. I guess it just wasn't what he wanted.

I just feel so horrible for my friend, and my biggest hope for her is that she can move on from this. It's obviously going to take quite some time for her to do that, but I hope that she can do it. I guess I feel sad because I know that she is hurting. And I guess it's still so hard to believe that it happened.

I guess what happened makes me feel relieved that I'm single. There are times when I wish I wasn't, but there are many times when I'm glad I am. I know not every guy is like the one my friend was going to marry, but just knowing that something like this could and does happen makes me feel glad I'm not in a relationship.

Comments

BosieLadie said…
OMG! I'm so sorry about your father's condition. I hope he seeks medical attention before the end of July! And your poor friend, she must be devastated. It will take time to heal, but heal she will. Being there for her is the best you can do.
My grandfather is pretty much the same way about his. I'm not even sure what the real deal is about it either because of this. I guess there are different degrees of it and surgery isn't always done right away? Or at least this is what I've gathered from him...

I'm so sorry about your friend's wedding. How devestating. It sounds horrible, but at least she found out beforehand instead of being married to someone who didn't want to be married.

If you need to talk - I'm here.
Hang in there. Hugs, ~ Lori

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