Saturday, January 30, 2010

The Big Chill

We're dealing with super low temps this weekend. It's 11 degrees with a 1 degree windchill right now. The sun is shining bright as can be, but it sure isn't doing anything to heat us up! I'll be in for the weekend, but that's ok. I got my periwinkle beads that I ordered, and I've been working on bracelets. I want to make as many as I can with the beads I have before I post them anywhere. I've gotten many requests for pics and prices, but I need to see how much I can make first. I made a bracelet sale last night from a phriend in CA. Thank you, Imelda!! She bought 3 bracelets actually, and I sure hope she likes them when she gets them! My first sale of 2010! Whoo hoo!! :) I better get to working now before I decide to take a nap!!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Fiery Dreams

In the past couple weeks, I have been having recurring dreams about fire. I wish they were cozy campfire dreams, or sitting by the fireplace romantic sort of dreams. Unfortunately, these dreams about fire have to do with a house fire, and trying to escape from it. I have even tried to come up with a plan of how to get Mittens out of here with me if my place were ever up in flames. It's caused quite panicky dreams, and I've often woke up feeling like I've lost something. It really makes me happy when I open my bedroom door to that huge ball of fur waiting for me to serve him breakfast. I know there has to be significance to why I'm dreaming about fire. Usually your dreams aren't literal, there is something else they represent in your life. So when I googled "dreams about fire," I found several interesting interpretations. One site said that dreaming of a fire burning down a house can mean one is consumed by passions. Another site also suggested a fire dream can represent emotions out of control, and that they are usually suppressed anger. Holding grudges and emotions inside and not letting them go is another possible reason for dreaming about fires that destroy something, according to a third site I found. And yet another site also suggested that seeing a house burn down in a dream signifies that a close relative needs help desparately.

The interpretations I found really make sense with the emotions I've been dealing with the past few weeks. I'm trying very hard to get my emotions under control in regards to a situation I'm not very happy about, but there is really not much I can do about it. I'm just trying to accept it, but I'm finding it difficult. As I'm thinking about it, there are actually 2 problems that are giving me grief. One CAN be fixed, it's just waiting for the right people to do it, because I'm not the one who has to make the decisions regarding that situation. It just feels overwhelming right now. The fact that I'm still trying to recover from a 2-week cold (which is better, I'm just tired all the time), and the weather is crappy again, has just put me on an emotional roller coaster that I can't seem to get off. I'm not liking the start to 2010 so far, believe me. But I guess this is one month out of 12, so I am really hoping the rest of them aren't that bad!!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Seeing The Light

For the most part, my cold is gone. I finished the antibiotic I was taking on Sunday morning (evidently, I had forgotten to take one dose alone the way, which left me with one pill left, or else I would've been done with it Saturday night!). The sore throat is long gone, the ear has finally settled down. The only thing still not back to my normal is my energy level. It's frustrating. Saturday night I went to bed around 11:30pm (way early for me), and got up almost 12 hours later. I was able to do a few chores that afternoon, but by the evening I was pretty much whipped. Sunday I did laundry, but still was tired. I go through fatigue often, especially in the winter, while dealing with PH, but after being sick, it seems to be ten times worse. Today I went to pulmonary rehab for the first time in two weeks, and while I did good exercising, I was ready to crash awhile after I got home. I know it's going to take time to get back (hopefully) to where I was before I got sick. One day at a time, I guess.

During all this sickness crap, I've been trying to do more jewelry things. I made a bunch of bracelets, something I sort of abandoned a few years ago since the bracelets I had made weren't selling. I made 12 new ones, and have been hoping to get them to the store in North Tonawanda, but not feeling good and cold weather has prevented me from doing so. I have 5 bracelets made for Valentine's Day and the rest are just casual bracelets. So, I think I might have to just add them to my store. Not sure how much luck I'll have there, but considering V-Day is a couple weeks away, it'd be nice to have the bracelets someplace for people to see!

And speaking of bracelets, I found really pretty periwinkle beads last week from someone on Ebay. Periwinkle is the color of PH. It's not that easy to find, since people decipher the color in differents ways. Really, it's a bluish color, but I've seen it listed as almost purply in shade. Anyway, I debated whether to get the beads for bracelets, and posted on Facebook that I had found them and might make them into awareness bracelets if I got some. People seemed interested and some were asking how much I'd sell them for. Soooo, I bought some beads! Between the amount I bought (which wasn't really that many) and the stupid shipping, I paid about $35, and then I also bought silver awareness charms. So, I guess I'll see what happens when I actually make some up. If enough people are interested, I might have to buy more supplies! I plan on donating part of the cost to the PH Association. There wasn't even a second thought about doing that! I can't wait for the stuff to get here so I can get to creating!

Monday, January 18, 2010

Not As Blah

It's been several days since I posted about sick, and well, I've gotten a little better but not fully! Although I'd been using prescribed drops in my right ear since Friday, the ear hadn't really gotten any better, and my sore throat was still really bad. Especially at night and in the early morning hours. I woke up very early Sunday morning (5am) in such pain that I just didn't know what to do. I took an Excedrin since Tylenol doesn't seem to be helping much, and was awake for a couple hours after b/c of the caffeine! When I finally did drift off, it was 8am, and I woke up a little after 10. I finally decided just to call the on-call service at my PCP's office. The on-call doc got back to me about 45 minutes later. He sounded like he was on the highway, and I wasn't sure if he could even hear me b/c I could barely hear him. But, apparently he did, b/c he called in a script for amoxicillin! I took it 3 times yesterday, and so far today I haven't had a sore throat! However, I was up until almost 3am last night b/c I was so wide awake for some reason!!! When I finally did go to bed, I was up every half an hour coughing my brains out. I think it's b/c things are starting to drain. So needless to say, I really am looking forward to a nap!! In fact, that's what I'm going to do right now since I'm falling asleep while typing!!!

Thursday, January 14, 2010


I am sick. Not only in the physical sense, as I've had a sore throat and now sort of a stuffy nose since Monday. Emotionally I'd say I'm sick as well. I haven't felt myself for awhile lately, which started the day Mason died. But lately there's been a lot on my mind that's been too much for me to deal with emotionally, and I'm trying to sort it all out. Maybe I'll feel better soon. Right now, I'm just trying to get over this stupid cold. So back to bed I go, for the third time today. I feel like all I want to do is sleep.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

An Attempted Escape

Due to the nasty cold weather, I hadn't been out of the house since last Thursday, New Year's eve. So, when my mom asked me yesterday if I'd like to try going to a few places, I thought sure. I got all ready to go, layered myself, put the hat, gloves, and scarf on, and was all ready! My mom picked me up and we went to McDonald's first to get something to eat in the drive-thru. There is a few stores near the restaurant that we wanted to go into after, so we just ate in the parking lot. I reached down to get my antibacterial lotion out of my purse, and I felt my nose drip. So I took off the cannula to blow my nose, and I see lots of blood. Oh, just wonderful! I had a nosebleed. I barely ever have nosebleeds like that. I mean, during the winter with the dryness of the season, there is some traces of blood when I do blow my nose. I know, gross and not what you wanted to know, but tough. I have to deal with it every day! lol So anyway, to get a full-out nosebleed is a rare occurrence. I got Kleenex and kept trying to deal with it for the next 10 minutes. I was getting aggravating! Just when I thought maybe I was ok, I was wrong. Eventually it did end, but I had no idea if it really was over. I wasn't sure whether to go into the store or what, so I told my mom just to take me home. And of course, after she did, and for the rest of the day, I had no problems. It was just incredibly disappointing to me to actually have a chance to get out of the house, in weather that was actually pretty decent and not too artic, and then to have a stupid thing like a nosebleed ruin it all. I admit I sulked for the afternoon! Even listening to music couldn't really get me out of my little mood I had going!

Today I am much better. I was nervous going out to rehab this morning because I thought I might have a problem again, but so far my nose has been behaving! Even though I exercised at home on Tuesday, I haven't been to rehab since before Christmas. It felt good to get there and see my friends! After that, I visited my friend's mom's husband in the same hospital, since I was there anyway! I chatted with them for a bit and then left to go to the store I had wanted to go to yesterday until the blood started pouring. lol I picked up some items, and I've been resting here now for a couple hours. I'm going out to dinner with Mandy tonight! I'm excited, and I'm pretty sure she is, too! She called me last night asking when I could use the gift card Karen had gotten me from Chili's. Mandy sounded kinda desparate. Soooo, we're going to enjoy dinner and maybe browse in Walmart since it's right there, too! I'm off for a nap now so I'll actually be able to make it to dinner!!

Saturday, January 02, 2010

The Holidays

The holidays have come and gone, and I can hardly believe it! Every year it goes by so quickly, even though it feels like it takes to long to get there. I was ready for celebrating a couple weeks beforehand, which felt nice. I didn't feel like I was rushing around still trying to get things. I actually really liked the fact that we exchanged names this year. I think it worked out well!

Lisa and Brandon and their little guy spent the entire day last Saturday trying to get here. The trip is so long anyway, but when they had to stop to feed B. every few hours or so, it made the trip a bit longer. But B. did very well for a 14+ hour trip! Thank goodness, he slept most of the way!

Sunday afternoon, Lisa, Brandon and Joan stopped by with the little guy and food! What a difference a few months make, B. has grown so much. I was holding him and he was definitely a bit heavier than in July. But he felt so comfy in my arms! Eventually I had to hand him back over to Lisa because my arms were getting too tired. I may work out at rehab, but my arms aren't that strong to keep holding him for awhile! Since Lisa and Brandon were there, I asked if they could move my treadmill into the jewelry room. They did, so I have no more excuses not to workout at home anymore!! I just keep putting it off til the start of the first full week of January! lol

Sunday evening, we went to The Cheesecake Factory. My parents had never been there, so we thought it would be nice if they tried some place different! My mom wanted our Christmas gift to be a nice dinner somewhere, and after failed attempts to think of places, Lisa suggested TCF. We had to wait for a bit, but when we sat down, we had a very good time! The food was delicious, everyone had something different. Then we ordered 4 pieces of cheesecake to take back to Mandy's house so we could eat it after opening gifts. We left the restaurant and headed to Mandy's!

Opening gifts was fun, but even better was just watching the kids and listening to the laughter from everyone! We had a great evening. Everyone loved what they received, the kids were so excited about opening their gifts, and it was just a very nice evening spent together!

Monday I went with Lisa, Brandon and B. to Mandy's house to hang out for awhile with the kids. Watching them all play together was just cute! Trying to take a picture of them all together was just hilarious and hardly worked. But we gave it a good effort, and there has got to be at least one picture that's decent enough to use as a picture for a frame Lisa got my parents! We were going to venture to the mall afterward, but we ended up skipping it since a gift card was forgotten. I was dropped off, and spent the rest of the day just resting and trying to keep warm!

Tuesday was just freezing! I didn't go anywhere during the day, but Joan picked me up after getting Chinese food so I could hang out with the family at my parents'. Mandy, Ron and the kids came over for a bit, more pictures were taken, and then Lisa's friend came over to visit as well. We had a great evening, I got to hold little B. for awhile, and I just wanted to squeeze him!! After being there several hours, Lisa's friend brought me back home. We had said goodbye to Lisa, Brandon, and little B. since they were leaving in the morning. Such a short visit, but at least we did get to see them for the holidays!!

New Year's Eve was spent up in Amherst with good friends and warm hot chocolate. The temperature was actually in the 40s, and it was rainy. I was happy about it since Dee and I had left earlier to go to a bunch of stores before meeting for coffee. We had a good time together, and after I dropped Dee off, I went to have dinner at my parents' house, and played some Wii with Joanie. I went home afterward, and spent the rest of the evening hanging out on the couch. I rang in 2010 with some good phriends, and went to bed awhile after that. I know, not very exciting, but I just don't really do much the new year!

I have been in the house ever since that night. We had a ton of snow over the weekend. Niagara Falls got almost 3ft within 2 days! It still has been snowing every day, but hopefully that's settled down a bit. It is pretty, I must admit! I'm just glad I haven't had to drive in it yet. The temperatures are really what's keeping me inside. They've been downright cold, especially with the windchills. I'm glad I'm not desparate for groceries, but I do need to eventually go out and get things I need for the house. I really do need to go out on Friday since I have a doctor's appointment, so I'm hoping it won't be so bad. This time of year is just not fun for me!! This is why I'd much rather have hot weather. I can deal with that much more than the freezing cold!!

Friday, January 01, 2010

A New Year!

Happy New Year! I really hope this new year and the start of a new decade brings about much positive change for everyone, and not just my family and friends. The world has been on a roller coaster ride ever since the 2000s began, and I'm just hoping that maybe things can be more settled. Maybe the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq will end very soon? Maybe an agreement can be reached by all major countries on how to resolve global warming? Maybe we can cure AIDS? Heck, maybe we can cure all diseases, including PH!! Ok, I'm reaching, but am I?? What will this new decade bring? I sure hope that more positives come out of this new year and these next 1o years that will make the world a better place. But I also hope the best for all those I know and love! Maybe 2010 bring much health and happiness to all, much success in everything you do!