One Long Month

A month ago today we lost Mason, and it still seems like it was yesterday. The pain isn't as unbearable as it was that first week. But I still miss him like crazy. I still see his picture sometimes, and my brain just can't comprehend that I won't be talking to him anymore. And that brings me to tears. It's getting better, but I know it's going to take time.

I'm still trying to keep myself busy. I went back to rehab today, which was a little brutal since I hadn't exercised in a week. I didn't bother going while Lisa was in town last week. I have to pay for another 8 sessions very soon, but unfortunately just don't have the money this month to do it. So I went today, but I won't go Thursday. I'll do the same next week. And if I have to, I just won't go for another week. I can exercise at home, which is good. I just can't give up the rehab because I KNOW myself. I won't exercise at home regularly!!

My hope chest is done, except for the brass pieces that need to be screwed back on. Unfortunately, when my dad was trying to take one of the screws out, it broke, so there is a piece of screw in the hope chest. He's been trying to figure out how to get it out of there without completely ruining it. I think he was working on it last night. I'm not sure what the outcome was, and I'm afraid to call. lol I just can't wait to have it, though. It should be very, very soon!!

I set up Skype on my laptop and my mom's computer, so we can call each other and use the webcams! Lisa and Brandon have a webcam, and Mandy and Ron do, too. So hopefully we'll be able to talk to Lisa and see the baby more! I did talk to her for a bit last night, and she kept putting the baby right up to the camera. It was funny! I miss them already, though. I wish they were just a bit closer. It would be easier to be able to visit more if she wasn't 14 hours away by car.

I'm trying to think to hard of what to write, so I better get off here before I start with gibberish!!


Nancy said…
I visit with my sisters all the time using Skype. You will love using it. :o)
~ Lor said…
Hi Colleen - checking in to see how you are doing. Good to hear you are keeping yourself busy. It's so hard losing someone. I've been trying to do the same thing these past few months. Hang in there. hugs, ~ L
Anonymous said…
Sorry I am kinda lagging with the Blogs...LOL..Seems FB and farming take up alot of time ;))

I know it still seems so weird without Mason around, I keep thinking he will just pop up and start joking...and giving me a hard time...I know some days are better but then so many things seems to remind me of him...
Hang in there Girl, I am here as always...Hugs to ya :)))

Love ya :))
Cathy said…
Im so sorry I havent been reading or writing in blogs lately until today.. I just started crying all over again when I saw Mason's pic.
I believe its going to take quite some time before we can all accept that he is gone! I just blogged about him... how funny that I did that today and I read urs, today.
I know what ur r feeling and I know what u are going through.. I am here if you need me :)
(((((HUGS))))) y besos!
Teddybear said…
Hi Colleen I know it's been awhile but I have been praying for you. I know you and Mason were very close - I still cry myself when I go to my blog and see his picture - if only his new pair of lungs could have come in sooner.

You will love the webcam with Skype - that is the way I talk to my girlfriend in Israel. At least once a week we can get "together" and have vitual coffee. Take care and I'll talk to you soon, love Deb.

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