Who Knew?

When I go through really tough times, I tend to rely heavily on music to help me get through the rough patches. This has been especially true since Mason's death. I've been listening (and crying) to music that reminds me of him, or happens to tell how much he meant to me. I've also been listening to music that he liked, songs he told me about, and songs I tried to get him to like. lol I was listening to my earphones late one night, unable to sleep, and the song "Who Knew?" by Pink came on. I listened to the lyrics, and they just really fit. Who knew that I'd only Mason for 3 short years? If someone could have told me that I wouldn't know him much longer, I'd never believe them. It feels like he has always been there. I think the biggest problem I'm trying to get over is the fact that I had been wanting to tell him for weeks how much he meant to me, and that I loved him as a best friend. I had told him that a long time before, but when he was in the hospital again back in March, and he got back home, I just kept wanting to tell him again. I don't know what stopped me from doing so. Even though I know he knew, and I know how much he cared for me, too, it still hurts like heck that I didn't let him know for sure. But, I know I will meet him again one day, and I will be able to tell him. Right now I'm still just trying to heal.

Pink - Who Knew lyrics

You took my hand, you showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
Uh huh, that's right
I took your words, and I believed
In everything you said to me
Yeah, huh, that's right

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong
I know better, cause you said forever, and ever
Who Knew?

Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
Oh no, no, no
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now
'Fore there long gone
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong
They knew better, still you said forever, and ever
Who knew?

Yeah, yeah
I'll keep you locked in my head until we meet again
Until we, until we meet again
I won't forget you my friend
What happened?

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong and
That last kiss
I'll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes
It harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep
Your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling
Who knew?

My darling
My darling
Who knew?
My darling
I miss you
My darling
Who knew?

Who knew?

Comments

Nancy said…
Don't be so hard on yourself. Mason knew how much he meant to you and how much you cared: he knew.
9:57 AM
Anonymous said…
Colleen..I know Mason knew how much you cared for him..please try and just know that and I know some songs really just made the tears start flowing..I really like that song...Just as you told me..Mason would want you to be happy and get through this..I know ...we all grieve so different and in our own time and ways..Just know I am here...and I know he knew how much u cared and loved him........

Hugs ......Luv ya...;)))
2:00 AM
Lori @ Purple Snapdragons said…
I believe he knew and he knows even still and you will keep him and his memory alive in your heart. Hugs, feel better...
1:38 PM
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