Feelings

Lately I have just been feeling....well, not myself, I guess. I feel stuck in a place I don't want to be in. I'm not sure how I've physically been feeling lately. Some days are worse than others, it seems. And I'm not sure if it's b/c I felt like I was coming down with something, or if it's b/c mentally, I'm not all that happy. Could be a combination of both. I wonder sometimes if I'll ever be ok, if I'll find something that makes me happy, if I'll find someone who'll make me happy too. Right now, I don't feel as if either of those things will happen.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Most Inspiring Possession

Image
A dear friend named Judi, whose journal I've been reading for years, has brought back her ARTSY ESSAY CONTEST ! I'm very excited about this, and hope that others will read the wonderful essays already posted in Judi's blog! Here is the topic for this month's new installment: What is your favorite and most inspiring possession? Tell us about it, and if you want an extra creative challenge... tell us about it without naming it until the very last sentence of your essay:):):) I own alot of possessions. When I first moved out of my parents' house, almost 9 years ago, I took this possession with me. It was mine, I had bought it, but I did allow the other members of my family to use it from time to time while I was at home. This possession has been a tremendous outlet for me to do a wide variety of things. I was able to record the barking of our first family dog, something that was cherished when she sadly died way too early for her doggy lifespan. I also was able to save...
Read more

The Ideal Day

Once again, it's that time of month for dear Judi's Artsy Essay Contest! Please see the rules and regulations for this month here . I entered a couple month's ago when Judi decided to revive this wonderful contest, and decided I'd like to give it a shot this month! Here goes! My Ideal Day My ideal day would start out at 7am to get ready for work, instead of getting up to take a pill. My ideal day would be going to work as a teacher, instead of wondering if I'd feel well enough to do anything for that day. My ideal day would be working out at a gym, instead of hoping to have enough energy to just walk for 6 minutes on the treadmill at home. My ideal day would be to freely walk about around my home and in public, instead of being tethered to a plastic tube going into my nose, providing oxygen to keep me going. My ideal day would be remembering meeting times with friends or family, instead of keeping track of the 8 different times I need to take a pill or vitamin in ...
Read more

Lost

Growing up with pulmonary hypertension and congenital heart disease was sometimes lonely, because there wasn't anyone around me who felt the same way I did physically. No one had to stay out of gym because they got too tired and too short of breath like I did on a constant basis. No one had to wear a holter monitor like the one time I had to in 4th grade. Talk about trying to play mum ball in class, all you could hear was the monitor thing making noise. Although I could always go to sports games, I wasn't able to participate in any type of sport, because again, it was just physically way too much for my body to handle. I didn't really regret any of this. I thought it was just me and my normal. I thought I was the only person out there who really dealt with this kind of thing, but that was ok. I graduated high school, and started college. I worked, went to classes, and in the last year of college, started going out a lot more. I graduated with my education degree, and began ...
Read more