Welcome to the ramblings of a girl with Pulmonary Hypertension..sharing the ups and downs of this disease, and just about anything else I want to share! Enjoy, and thanks for visiting! :)
Oral Medication IV
Adcirca (tadalafil or Cialis), was FDA-approved to treat PH symptoms in 2009. It works the same way Revatio works. The difference is that Adcirca is taken once a day, whereas Revatio is taken three times a day.
Back in May, even though I was anxious about it, I put myself back into the dating world by creating a profile on one of those dating websites. It happens to be free, which I can afford, but it really has some interesting characters. Well, I suppose the ones you pay for do as well, but that wasn't the route I could really go down. Anyway, I have chatted with many guys since then. Some don't last past a few conversations, some have led to meeting in person, but then nothing after that. A few I texted for awhile, but nothing really happened. It's been an up and down roller coaster, but at least I've been getting myself out there, or at least trying to.
During the last week of October, a guy sent me a message, and after some back and forth messages, we talked on the phone for awhile one night. He seemed rather nice, we had a lot to chat about, so we met in person on November 1st. He's a handsome guy with nice eyes, even though he says they are a boring brown. I think …
This afternoon I had to get some blood work done for two different doctors. One script was for my regular testing to make sure my liver still likes the PH medication I've been on for almost 14 years, and to make sure I'm not pregnant (don't really need to do it, I know I'm not lol), and the other script was to check hormones, thyroid and a few other things for a problem I've been having. I went after volunteering, and the place was nice and quiet, so I was out of there shortly after. Before I left the building, I decided to use the ladies' room. While I was washing my hands, I looked in the mirror and noticed all the gray hairs that were coming out of the top of my head. My normal reaction to seeing them is "Ugh, I really need to get my hair done!" But today, my instant reaction to seeing them was:
"I should be thankful I have gray hairs, because it means that God's allowed me to age."
It took me aback that THAT thought popped into my hea…
I am constantly struggling every day with what I'm DOING every day. And if what I'm doing is worthwhile. I think because I don't have a job, I feel like I'm wasting my time. And yet, my heart knows this isn't true. But my mind is having huge conflicts with this, and I just don't know how to get over it. It's the biggest cause of my anxiety, and some days it's just terrible. I keep telling myself the only person judging me on how I live my life is ME. ME alone!! And there is no reason for that! I am proud of myself for the things that I have found to do to fill many of my days....like exercising, yoga, meditation, volunteering, painting, etc....and yet, I feel like they mean nothing. I tell myself over and over again that my life isn't like anyone else's, and my life is the way it is for a reason. I just wish I could learn not to be so hard on myself. This issue would bother me once in awhile, but it's been awful since breaking up with the ex…