Daily Ponderings

Ever since Friday, there's been this strange silence. It feels so weird not to be listening to an oxygen concentrator. I mean, it has been a part of my life over the last 9 or so years. To hear nothing is just odd!! I will eventually get used to that, but it might take me awhile! Today another silence is upon the house. My upstairs neighbor knocked on my door this afternoon, and when I opened it, she went to give me some rent money, and broke down crying. She said she was sorry, she had just put Frasier down that morning. I was taken aback. I told her how sorry I was, and she hugged me and kept apologizing for any problems she caused. All I could think about were the times I got irritated with Frasier barking so much, but many of those times I just dealt with it through listening to headphones. I asked if Frasier was sick, and she said they think he had a tumor. She was just inconsoleable, and turned to go upstairs. I told her if there was anything she needed to please let me know....

Yesterday, I was introduced to the world of liquid oxygen! Yep, I decided to go for it! Mandy and Ron came over on Thursday night to take apart the daybed. I situated the room for jewelry and for space for the 2 reservoir tanks that I knew would be coming, and was all set for Friday's delivery. The o2 guy came in the afternoon (I'm pretty sure his name was Mike, but I am phorgetting already lol), and I showed him the area I wanted the tanks. He did suggest that I put them in the front hallway, maybe at another time, because it would be so much easier for them just bring the dolly up the stairs and fill the reservoirs, instead of traipsing through the house with wet or snowy dollys in the winter. And the tanks will fit! So, I'm thinking next Friday when they come to fill, I'll just have them move the tanks into the hallway anyway. Mike (?) showed me how to use the tanks. They seemed pretty simple enough! The tricky part was trying to show me how to use the cute lil Helio...

Last summer, I had the unfortunate opportunity to get a visit from a representative of a group called US Energy Savings. The guy explained how the electric company's supply services constantly can go up, and if you signed up with US Energy Savings for 5 years, you are guaranteed to be locked into one price. So no matter what happens, if the electric company's supply goes through the roof, you still pay for the price you got locked into when signing up with them. So, I thought sure, why not. I signed up for it, and several months later wished I hadn't. You only had 30 days to cancel their service, but I forgot, and never did. If you tried cancelling earlier than the 5 year contract, you'd pay a big fee. So I felt stuck at 11 cents a kilowatt, which was the rate I was locked into after signing up. In June, I received a letter from them. They said that after I signed up, they neglected to send me my welcome information. So, because of their error, I was given 30 days from ...

I've been on oxygen for almost 1o years. In all that time, I've used a concentrator and portable tanks. Well, I'm trying to make a decision on whether or not to change this. Why? The electric bill is just getting out of hand. I'm on the budget plan for National Grid, but I still have to pay at least $100 a month! I have tried so much to cut down on energy. I've changed almost all my light bulbs to the new energy saving ones. I keep my toaster unplugged, parts of the computer unplugged, the washer unplugged. I'd unplug the dryer, but I just can't reach the cord all the time to keep taking it out and putting it back in. I'm just at a loss, and I don't know what to do to make my bill cheaper! I hadn't really considered getting liquid o2 before because I just don't have the room. The hallway wasn't safe because of having a tenant upstairs. Every room of my apartment just didn't have the space for the liquid o2 unit. I have a lot of furnit...

Last night around 8:30pm, I started noticing lightning in the skies. It wasn't much at first, but within half an hour, it was getting worse and worse. And cooler and cooler. It got really bad and very bright at some points, which made me get off the computer and just watch the lightning from my dark computer room window. I am always amazed at thunder and lightning. I love the storms, except when they cause damage, of course! I had never seen a lightning storm like last night, though. At 1am, when I was finally dozing in bed, it was STILL going off. I couldn't believe that almost 5 hours later we were still getting the lightning!! We have chances of thunderstorms for most of this week, but I am pretty sure I won't ever see a night of heaven's fireworks like that again, at least not for awhile.

This weekend is the annual Lewiston Art Festival, something I've loved to go to for quite a long time. I've been to it almost every summer for at least the last 10 years, and it's been running even longer than that. There are so many different artists who make such a wide variety of things: handmade jewelry (they are supposed to make some aspect of the jewelry, whether it be the beads, hammered silver, something like that, but I'm telling you that some of those vendors are NOT doing that!!), pottery, glass pendants, pictures and paintings of all sorts, wooden items, etc, etc. I love to go to just browse at everything, especially the jewelry and any glass items. I like to get ideas, and I just love looking at anything glass! This year I went with mom and Joan. We got there a little after 1pm, and had to walk a bit to get to the main street where it's located. This year, they changed a few things, including closing the main street to traffic. BRILLIANT idea!!! There ...

August 2, 2009 I guess I had a better night's sleep. I've only been up for 45 minutes, and haven't ventured downstairs yet. But I am dressed and mostly packed. We'll probably leave in the early afternoon. I've enjoyed my visit here, but I'm not sure it brought me the peace and comfort I was looking for. I don't know what I'm looking for. I just feel lost. I'm not quite sure how to explain it. I'm hoping thise feeling of emptiness will pass soon. I'm looking at all the pages I've written since I've been here. Wow, I got a lot out. I'll be typing all of it into my blog when I get back. My handwriting has sucked through most of these entries. No wonder I've enjoyed blogging so much more since I stopped writing in my actual journal! --------------------------------------------------------- Ok, this is me writing in the here and now! It's August 5th, and I got home safely, for the most part. Mom was getting tired on the way bac...

August 1, 2009 I woke up at 6am, and thought about looking out the window for a possible deer siting. I was just too tired to do it. So a little after 7, I woke up again to take Revatio and took a quick peek. Nothing. I woke up again close to 10am. After breakfast, a shower, and getting dressed, I felt like I already needed a nap. Grandma told me just to go lay down since we weren't doing much, so I came upstairs for awhile. I guess I feel better. I'm not totally sure. We are supposed to visit mom's Uncle Eddy in a bit, and then go to church, then to Aunt Beverly's for dinner. I'd like to ask Beverly about hosting a jewelry party for Mandy and me. She knows quite a few people, and she loves hosting parties! I can't see her saying no! I don't know what it is about this trip, but I feel more and more that perhaps I need to go talk to someone again like I did years ago when I was dealing with so many emotions. Mason's death is one blatantly obvious reason t...

July 31, 2009 I had a somewhat restless night. It's still raining, and it's very blah out. Gee, kinda like home! I woke up at 6:30am and decided to see if I could spot any deer in the backyard. I put on my glasses and sat on the floor to look out the window. I thought perhaps I had spotted a deer, but the gloominess of the early morning and the fact that my glasses are not the same prescription as my contacts made me finally realize that it was just part of a tree. Duh! So I went back to bed, woke up about an hour later to take Revatio , and looked out the window again. Still no deer. Oh well, maybe tomorrow. ---------------------------------------------------- We just got back from having lunch with my cousin, Ryhan , and two of her daycare kids. We had the lunch buffet at Pizza Hut. It wasn't too bad, considering I never eat there anymore. The kids get to eat free, so that's a plus! Afterward, mom and I went to a store called Bargain Hut. Mom grew up knowing the shop ...

I went to my Grandma's house in Horseheads, NY last Wednesday to Sunday with my mom. I wrote. A lot. So, I'm going to type the entries I wrote here. I'd scan them, but my handwriting isn't the best for some reason, and I don't want to blind anyone. lol July 30, 2009 I'm sitting on my Grandma's front porch listening to music. My mom and I got here last night. We had left around 3:30, a little later than my mom had wanted. The trip isn't that long really, about 3 hours give or take. The ride down started out wet and a little worrisome. My mom was rather sleepy! When we stopped at the Scottsville rest stop, she got a snack and a drink, and that helped. I had also popped in my Michael Jackson CD, and we bebopped to that the rest of the way! We at at Friendly's when we got into town. It was rather noisy in there! We lost our Friendly's over a decade ago, so I forgot how loud that place could be. By the time we ate and got to Grandma's, it was clos...

When my Grandpa S. died 15 years ago, I got several items from him, including a table, his glass candy dish, and his hope chest. The hope chest has been in my parents' basement all this time, which I didn't care about for the first 10 years since I hadn't moved and then when I did move, I kinda forgot it was there. But the past couple of years, I was really hoping to have it. It needed to be stripped and stained and completely refinished. My mom said last September she'd do it, and had started, but the stripping stuff was making her ill. I had tried to help her, but that stuff is really lethal!! I finally asked Eve in June if she'd come over to help strip it and stain it, and she spent a Friday afternoon at my parents' doing just that. So, here are the pictures! A week after she stained the hope chest, I bought the stuff to put over the finish, and put it on a couple times one of the days that Lisa was here. Finally last week, the hope chest was brought over by ...