What’s a lesson you learned the hard way? Write about it for 15 today.
Ever hear the phrase, "I wish I knew then what I know now?" I often wish I could go back and time and do things differently in regards to Euan. He was a big part of my life for several years, and I only met him twice in person. It's not like we were terribly far away. In fact, he was about the same driving distance as K's house. It was just that he was in Canada. And no, it's not like I couldn't go over there. I just had fears of driving over a bridge that was on the way to his house. I wish that I had just sucked it up and faced my fears. If I had, I may have gotten to see him more in person, and connect with him even more with direct contact. I have never felt so close to a man as I did with Euan. We understood each other on so many levels, and I'd never had that before. I'm not sure I'll ever have that again, but in a way that's ok. I will always remember what Euan and I had, because it was so special. I think the lesson I learned by not making more of an effort in seeing him, someone I truly cared for and loved deeply, was to not let fears get in the way. I'm trying to hard to face them head on sometimes. It isn't easy. But when I learned K. lived a half an hour drive from me, and that the easiest way of getting there is the highway, well I sucked it up and drove there. I'm not a huge fan of highway driving. But if I wanted to see him, how else was I going to get there?? I also didn't want to fly to Florida for the first time ever to a huge conference. But guess what?? As scared as I am, I'm going to face that fear in June! I'm also taking a giant leap by traveling without my parents. I've only done that once before. I've always relied so heavily on my parents, so this is going to be difficult for me, but I've got to prove to myself that I can do it. Why? Because let's face it, my parents aren't going to be around forever. I need to start realizing that I will have to end up taking control of things on my own because people won't always be around to rely on. So, that is a lesson I learned, especially after Euan passed away in 2010. I only wish I could go back in time and do things much differently.